Snakester's Nightmare Cubs Team

This was a fun list to make. There are plenty of bad Cubs players over the years, several I still shake my head about to this day. But that was life on the North side.

C: Todd Hundley - High expectations and a legacy to live up to. Too bad we got him way past his prime. It got downright sad during his tenure. I almost put Micheal Barrett in here cause that guy really pissed me off, but Todd takes the cake. Worthless.

1B: Hee Seop Choi - Can we ever get tired of busted farm system guys? He was supposed to be the next great thing, now his legacy is that we traded him for Derek Lee. He could barely field and couldn't hit crap. I don't think he lasted much longer after the Cubs gave up on him.

2B: Eric Young - He was past his prime (just like the Cubs like to get them) and really did nothing great at all. He was slow and couldn't hit or field. Sounds like the guy I wanted out there.
3B: Kevin Orie - He was the next Ron Santo, at least that is what everyone wanted us to believe. I think he had like 1 good at bat that lead to his short lived fame. Then Jim Hendry realized we needed something much better. I was never impressed and I think I used to swear when he would come to the plate.

SS: Neifi Perez - Dusty loved trotting this guy out there. I am pretty sure that is why they finally said enough to him. Neifi just sucked. It was hard to watch any game he played and think that they were gonna win. But for some reason he was Dusty's guy and made for alot of bad Cubs memories.

RF: Jacque Jones - This was kind of a by default choice. Really there weren't many right fielders besides Andre & Sammy. Although if Kosuke doesn't improve!! I give Jacques credit for coming through pretty good down the stretch in '07. Still way too up and down for my taste. Alot of cringe moments when he would swing at some outrageously bad pitches.

CF: Corey Patterson - This one was easy. I remember always hearing this name, he is gonna be the answer. He will save the Cubs. What a joke. That is when I learned to not listen to what the organization says about their farm system talent. I hope they all got fired over this kid. Felix Pie isn't far off although he is showing signs. I chuckle when I see Corey striking out for the Reds. Dusty deserves him.

LF: George Bell - I remember being upset as a kid when the Cubs traded Bell to the White Sox for Sammy Sosa. Of course that didn't last long. One move they got right. He was slow and only a marginal hitter. There have been plenty of bad options in left but George stuck out to me.


Ok lets move to pitching. This is where I probably had my list done in about 5 minutes. I remember everyone one of those crap slingers that pissed me off over the years.

Starters: Jaime Navarro, Mark Clark, Julian Tavarez, Kevin Foster & Glendon Rusch - Navarro was a huge bust but at least they got rid of him. Mark Clark was average at best but the Cubs thought he was the shit for some reason. Julian always seemed to have blisters, slivers, bruises, etc, whatever that wouldn't allow him to pitch. Then when he did he just sucked. Rusch is like the homer king. Seems like he was always giving up the big homers every game. He is proof that all you need to be is left handed to pitch in the majors, doesn't matter if you are any good. Kevin Foster just recently pasted away from cancer (RIP) so I decided not to speak too ill of him. I put him on though because there was one season he was one of 3 pitchers in the league to have 10 wins by the All-Star break. Then he only ended up with 12 for the year and the Cubs had a second half slide. Broke my heart.

Relievers: Kyle Farnsworth, Turk Wendell, Felix Heredia, Mitch Williams - Just a smoresgesboard of bad pitching. Farnsworth could throw heat just no where near the plate. His necklace issues always bugged me too. Turk is just a name I can never forget. Heredia blew lots of games for them. He seemed so good for like 2 months and it was that let down I will never forget. Mitch 'Wild Thing' Williams was never as good as the hype. Funny though that he ended up blowing the World Series for someone else. That always makes me chuckle.

Closer: LaTroy Hawkins - Just plain bad. I dunno if he was the closer by default but he sucked. He was a whiner too and I hated that. Hmm a closer that buckles under pressure and blames someone else like the media. Sounds like time for a career change.

Utility Outfielder: Brant Brown - He did help supply the greatest sound byte in Ron Santo's history but I am sure that is one he would like to forget. I don't know why they thought he could work in the outfield.

Utility Infield: Cesar Izturis & Jose Hernandez - Izturis was a bust and I was never a fan of the guy. He was holding back The Riot! Hernandez seemed like for everything he did right he did 5 things wrong. We wasn't horrible but he was never good enough to play anywhere everyday.

Manager: Don Baylor - No not Dusty although he probably pissed me off the most. I don't know how Baylor was ever thought to be a good manager. I remember watching games wondering if he knew anything about the game of baseball.

Pitching Coach: Marty Demeritt - This is mostly a shout out to some good times making fun of the guy. I remember that he seemed to wear a whistle like he was a mean gym coach. He looked like he was ready to kick the crap out of anyone. Big Red & I used to joke about what he was thinking and saying when he would walk out to the mound with all those bad pitchers: threatening their lives, etc.